The art of naming

Why do Malayalees end up with such crazy names?
Sample some typical ones:
Biju, Baiju, Jino, Chintu.
Where on earth
do they get these names from?
While men end up with Siju, Binu, Mejo and Jithu;
for the girls its Seena, Liji, Dainy and Litty.
I can understand if you think
you're little one’s a Prince and name him so
(I have several such friends in eminent positions).
But if so where are all the Princesses????
We’ve had sensible names before –
George, Mary, Lakshmi, Krishna, Fatima, Sayed.
There’s a long list to choose from.
But no. We insist
on naming them
Laiju, Raijo, Bini, Chinju and Sinsy.
It leaves you wondering
whether you’re going to deal with
a man or a woman
though quite sure the person is from Kerala.

But I suppose it is that undefeatable spirit after all,
countering the unpronounceable
Shlovskis and Teacharlmiskas of the world
that created Sr. Lousy and the brothers
Kissme and Loveme.

Picking a nose

I have a neighbor

Aptly nicknamed Nosey

For he tells hubby

“Drive your car to work

not your scooter”

and me –

“had any more flash flood in the flat

when you went out and

left the washing machine on?”

But I wonder,

what would happen

if he nosed too far

and got his nose

stuck

in a big-deep-blue bucket

full to the brim

of untainted evil.